Bringing young adults back to church.
Hello fellow members of Oregon ELCA. My name is Sean and I am a member of West Linn Lutheran church. I am a graduate student at Western Oregon, and I got my bachelors in sociology at Portland State. As a student of the social sciences, I could not help but the notice the demographics of mine and many ELCA denominations: almost exclusively white, older, a few famalies and almost nobody in the 18-35 age category. Because of these concerns, I had I beleive that the Holy Spirit led to stand up in front of my congregation at the annual meeting in January to make a stand for my generation. The ELCA needs more people from my generation if it wants to survive. My generation needs to know that we are progressive Christians that stand for tolerance, justice and peace; not judgement and condemnation. But i get overwhelmed when i think: how? How can I open the door to people in this age group? So, since i have been stuck on these questions, I am looking to others (espcially to those of you nearby in the Portland-Salem area) for assistance, advice, expierences, questions, comments, concerns. How can i get this ministry afloat?
Young adults
Hi, Sean - almost every denomination, including the ELCA, has been tracking this "graying" trend for decades and it is becoming a critical problem. The questions aren't as much about church growth anymore as much as simple church survival. My kids are young adults (23-27) and see that very few of their peers have any interest in church, even those who grew up in the church. Somehow the church have managed to lose relevancy with the culture - we haven't demonstrated the Gospel message of acceptance and celebration as much as we've worked to maintain traditions that don't seem to translate into anything meaningful for anyone under the age of 40. Trust me - there are lots of people searching for answers to this one - lots of things are being tried - check in with the Project Believe team here in the Oregon Synod and see what they're up to. Perhaps they could use an interested young adult on the team! :-)
Bringing Young Adults Back to Church
It seems that many churches are struggling with just your issues, Sean--how do we bring young people back to church? Of course, the church needs to meet the needs of that age group in the type of service offered and the music. While I am of retirement age, I recognize that the service I grew up with is not likely the service that your generation needs and I need to make room for you. About 10 years ago I also questioned whether or not there was a place for me in the Lutheran church, especially because I was told that my daughter (a lesbian) was not welcome. How could that be? She was certainly welcomed when she was baptized and again when she was confirmed. What had changed?
Now I attend a congregation that is a Reconciling in Christ congregation--one that has had discussion about welcome to all and has written a welcoming statement that name the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender person intentionally (along with inclusion of all races, cultures, economic status, etc.). While there is not an abundance of younger people in our congregation, this statement has let all know of the intentional welcome in our congregation of folks who have felt left out of the Christian world.
This is only one way the church can meet the needs of our young people. Thanks for stepping forward with this discussion. Perhaps there can be further discussion here to help us be relevant to many.
Bringing Young Adults Back to Church
I just wanted to make a very quick clarification regarding the prior comment by KJolly ... I do agree that there are, unfortunately, churches of varying denominations that are not accepting of all populations, but it is not true of all Lutheran congregations, and is definitely not true of the ELCA, of which West Linn Lutheran is a member. We take very seriously our mission statement that we 'Invite ALL people into a trusting relationship with God through Jesus Christ."
More on young adults and attitudes toward the church
Kelly - You are so right that many ELCA congregations take seriously their welcome for ALL people, including those who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender - we've been making huge strides in the direction of inclusive welcome over the past few decades. The difficulty comes when the loudest Christian message that the public hears is that of EXclusion and rejection based on personal interpretations of several Biblical passages. What young adults hear - often even in our own congregations - is that being gay is not acceptable to God, nor the church. If you talk with LGBT people, they very often tell stories of being rejected in their churches, sometimes overtly thrown out, sometimes expected to "repent" of their "lifestyle choice." And these very churches often have mission statements and outdoor signs that proclaim their "welcome for all". Simply put, LGBT people have learned from painful experience that "all" often means "all*" - with the unspoken unwritten asterisk meaning "*unless, of course, you insist on living a sinful 'gay lifestyle' and especially if you look/act gay or make anyone uncomfortable or have an actual partner that we would have to accept, etc."
Hence the emphasis for Reconciling in Christ congregations to make clear from the outset that they include LGBT people in "all" by creating an explicit statement that says so. LGBT people and their families often seek out congregations who have made that commitment to full inclusion - congregations who are willing to spell out the fact that their "all" includes LGBT people who are still actively rejected and discriminated against by many many churches (including some ELCA congregations) around this country and the world.
What does this have to do with young adults? A number of studies have made clear that the millennials actively avoid church because of the perception that churches are 1) judgmental 2) hypocritical, and 3) homophobic. See http://www.pewforum.org/Age/Religion-Among-the-Millennials.aspx for some really interesting information about how millennials view the church. Note this particular quotation:
According to the 2007 Religious Landscape Survey, almost twice as many young adults say homosexuality should be accepted by society as do those ages 65 and older (63% vs. 35%). Young people are also considerably more likely than those ages 30-49 (51%) or 50-64 (48%) to say that homosexuality should be accepted. Stark age differences also exist within each of the major religious traditions examined. Compared with older members of their faith, significantly larger proportions of young adults say society should accept homosexuality.
Another interesting article is this one: http://articles.latimes.com/2010/oct/17/opinion/la-oe-1017-putnam-religi... , which contains this quote:
Increasingly, young people saw religion as intolerant, hypocritical, judgmental and homophobic. If being religious entailed political conservatism, they concluded, religion was not for them.
So while clear and public inclusion of LGBT people certainly isn't the only thing that might help reverse the trend toward the defection of young adults from church, it is certainly relevant to the discussion. Silence, or assuming that LGBT people should just trust that we'll accept them should they decide to walk in the door, is not an effective way to counter the louder Christian voice of exclusion and judgment.
Thanks for this discussion!
Question...
Hi Folks: I agree that it's critical to reach out to a younger cohort, and I totally believe that your father's Oldsmobile isn't going to get you there. I think that "our" grief over the passing of the 1950's Greatest Decade in the Life of the Church is keeping us in worship and mission strangleholds that we need to release before we're able to move forward.
And I believe that being an RIC congregation is one, but only one, way to do that. However, there are other ways.
Where the younger cohort is streaming to is non-denom churches. They're obviously looking for something, and not finding it in mainline churches, but finding it there. If you're in Portland, go to Solid Rock (awesome place) and you'll see a boatload of young people. Personally, I think there's something to be learned from the non-denom churches if we can untrench ourselves from our "ecumenical partners" who are tanking in membership, just like the ELCA is.
Since I've come to Portland 14 years ago, ELCA Lutherans have dropped from 52,000 in a state of 3.5 mil to under 40,000, now in a state of 4 mil. We've dropped from 1.8 percent of the state's population to about 1 percent. Obviously, becoming an RIC synod isn't enough to bring people to ELCA churches.
At Zion we grew 10 percent in 2011 in worship attendance, giving, and membership, and we're on that same track in 2012. Of the 50 new members we've received in the past 18 months, about half are young families with children. Unfortunately, there aren't a lot of 18-30 year olds in town, as they move away from here when they get out of high school. So, while we're growing, we're not reaching that cohort.
One of my Preaching and Teaching Values is that I uphold marriage of one man and one woman. We're a very welcoming congregation, and we're not judgmental, hypocritical, or homophobic. We do have LGBT people at Zion, and we have families with the same.
My question is, Is there a congregation in the Oregon Synod that has been successful in reaching the LGBT folks in the younger cohort and is reflecting that in congregational growth? I know that there are only a few congregations in the synod that are growing, and at least two of them are because they're led by awesome long term pastors. But my question is pretty simple; are there congregations that are growing in numbers because of their LGBT/RIC stance and reaching the younger cohort that this discussion is about?
Thanks for any responses.
Eric Burtness
Zion, Redmond
Another article of interest
Just want to throw this out as well:
Could gay marriage debate drive young Christians from church?
http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/07/02/12524736-could-gay-marriage...
Young adults, connection and relationships
Hi everyone, I've been trying to figure out how to contribute here, just decided to jump in. No answers, just some thoughts. I really hear the concern about younger adults and I share it. It seems like sometimes we try to answer this on a program level (what programs we can offer, what style of worship, what brand of coffee...) but I don't think that gets to the heart of things. I think this is essentially about relationships and personal connections.
We do have some younger adults in our smallish, traditional-worship congregation and I'm trying to figure out how/why... First might be our location in NW Portland, where young newcomers often land and may stop in to check us out in those first weeks of trying to find community and a place to belong. Second might be the critical mass factor-- if you see at least some young people you get a sense you might find a place here. BUT-- it's not only younger people that matter-- I see quite a few younger adults eager to connect with elders, and when a "grandma" type person is outgoing toward them, interested in them as a person, that is a huge thing, something that welcomes them and keeps them connected. Our churches have a real strength in our elders. It is about elders being willing to make personal connections and take an interest. We also do have some outgoing younger members who intentionally welcome and talk with younger newcomers. (Point is, this goes way beyond the pastor being friendly--it's owned by a wider group.)
Typically the new people we get have some kind of church background and are in some kind of transition (new in town, expecting a baby, grief, divorce, getting involved in recovery process...they are intentionally looking for something). It is rare to get someone who is completely unchurched, unless a friend has invited them. For newcomers I have noticed that they are most open during those first few weeks in town before other activities start taking up all their waking moments. If the younger adults find someone to connect with personally (a pewmate, friendly peer, member, someone who guides them downstairs to coffee hour and sits with them) then chances are they will come back at least once. They may not join, and in fact I am finding people are increasingly less interested in formally joining the church--something is shifting there for sure. But I am happy if I see them from time to time. I try not to press, just keep welcoming. Some can be skittish and probably I have frightened some people off... well, you do what you can. I find that email contact is important, in fact I know some young people better through email than I do in person.
One tradition we have is a young adult beach retreat for a weekend in October. Some members own a beautiful home in Cannon Beach and have hosted this for many years. Sometimes it is 6 people, sometimes 12, but at least it is a once-yearly time to connect at a deeper level with others. We do not try to do other "youth-group" type planning of regular events to tempt young adults... this just has not worked for us. We keep talking about planning a BBQ or something, but rarely does a group gathering like this happen. It is not really a "groupy" ministry but rather focused on individual friendships and relationships. Some younger members get together for happy hour or other fun on their own terms and time, and this builds relationships.
Another way I as pastor have connected with younger adults in our neighborhood is through premarital counseling-- my name is on the Prepare/Enrich website and I get 1-3 calls a year to do counseling with couples being married out of town whose pastor requires they do counseling. I may not do the wedding (in fact I avoid nonmember weddings because of time constraints) but I get to know these couples at a pretty deep level. Sometimes this translates to them coming to church, but rather rarely actually. Still it is an outreach opportunity.
Wow, this ended up pretty long. Hope this helps a little.
Melinda Wagner
More on young adults and attitudes toward the church
Clearly there are many ways that we, as ELCA congregations, can (and must) go about demonstrating relevance to our culture, especially those under the age of 40. For some of our congregations, one piece of that effort has been to shatter the public perception that the church is anti-gay, which keeps many people away from our doors. This is only one piece of the puzzle - not nearly enough on its own, but nevertheless, it makes a difference.
Our congregation became Reconciling in Christ in 2010 by creating a clear statement of intentional welcome for people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender by an almost unanimous vote after a year of careful discussion and Bible study. Within the next several months, we had a significant influx of people – many young (straight) families – who came because they were seeking a church home in which full inclusion of all God’s people was held as a Christian value.
We take full inclusion seriously – we mean that everyone, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, is a fully-loved Child of God, created in the image of God, and we work to prevent any sense that anyone is “less than,” “not quite right,” or “unnatural” simply because they are not part of the sexual majority. What we value are faithful relationships of loving commitment that honor God and each other – what we abhor are relationships between people, regardless of gender, that abuse, devalue, or dishonor each other or separate us from God.
Just yesterday morning, during the announcment part of our worship service, a lesbian couple in our congregation who have been committed in relationship to each other for 14 years (and fortunate residents of Washington State) announced their impending marriage in October. The long, joyous, cheering response by the congregation clearly demonstrated our full support of their right to bind themselves together in marriage, just as a straight couple can do.
I’m proud of our congregation, taking seriously the work of justice to bring the marginalized out of the margins and giving up our place in the powerful center, learning from them the values of love, justice, persistence, patience, acceptance. This is part of what will keep us relevant in our world – I have no doubt, though we do it not to fill our pews, but because we believe it is what God calls us to do. It is our path – but it is simply one step. Keeping people engaged in the message of the Gospel once they walk in our door remains an ongoing challenge in an age where people's loyalty/commitment to their church has to be earned.
Meaning & Purpose
Sean,
The son of a good friend of mine recently completed seminary and was ordained earlier this spring. He attended one of our Saturday morning men's Bible study (Our wive's call it the men's therapy session) but after we finished our study we still had plenty of coffee to finish and got into this very discussion. One point that he made is that today's young people want to be part of something that has meaning and purpose. I found that comment to be quite prophetic and it gave me pause to think. How well do our longstanding congregations do in marketing any meaning or purpose? Are we to comfortable sitting in the pews like our parents and grandparents before us and although we attend church on Sunday are we really part of a "Church"? My church in Montana struggles attracting young people just like yours but I don't miss an opportunity to throw our mission statement out there and am constantly asking our active committees to figure out ways to involve the youth. At this point I think it's a great thing we have a mission statement and work to live up to it but I'm not convinced that it's enough. Us old stodgy gray hairs need to be more accepting of change in how we structure our church to make it attractive to people of all ages because as you note, the way we're doing it now isn't getting it done. We need to find meaning and purpose in what we do and involve everyone in the opportunity to particpate and then maybe we'll start to turn the corner. I hope that change comes soon as I'm excited about the possibilities but I'll admit I'm pretty open minded about change and welcome it. Keep working on this and stay involved in the church. You provide an example for others your age and that in itself is a huge help.
God Bless, Tom
Meaning and Purpose
Hey Tom:
Yep, you're exactly right. What people (and young people) are looking for is a deeper sense of meaning and purpose in life. That's a deep concern and longing that many mainline churches aren't hitting as they seek social activism, but miss the deeper longing for meaning and purpose.
I preach regularly about just such a thing, and have written two books about it, in fact, I have a third book coming out that you'll be hearing about in October. It's huge stuff, this meaning and purpose stuff. And once my third book comess out you'll be able to use it in your congregation.
Kinda under wraps now, but you'll hear about it in a couple months. Sorry for the "secrecy" but if that's what you're looking for, that's what I wrote about.
Rock on, Tom.
Eric Burtness
Zion, Redmond
So, Sean, back to you . . .
Interesting conversation to read now that it has been a little over a month since you posted. As a pastor who fits in this missing demographic I resonate with your question, Sean. And I have one in return:
Do you feel that your question has been heard/answered in this thread line?
I often find that well intentioned church-folk begin to answer the question they hear before they clarify what the 18 - 35 year old potential participant in any church life actually asked. And I think that is part of our challenge of welcoming this cohort of people into our faith life.
Looking at the demographic sociologically, the average person of this generation is currently struggling with the transition from being taken care of by parents to taking care of themselves. Whether that means college or first jobs or new marriages or first homes, in today's world it has often also meant debt, fear, loss, multiple jobs, and a tremendous amount of stress. (Yes, we all have this regardless of generation, but remember that this is the beginning of this journey for this age group.) It's tough to add volunteer activities into this mix, especially if it's new to you and feels charged with expectations and judgement. Not to mention that sometimes (dare I say, often?) your opinions and thoughts aren't listened to in the decision making process by well meaninged but silencing elders.
So, again, Sean, back to you. Do you feel that you were heard? Have you found any gems that will help you in your passion to reach this group of folks?
Here are my thoughts in specific reaction to your question: "So, since i have been stuck on these questions, I am looking to others (espcially to those of you nearby in the Portland-Salem area) for assistance, advice, expierences, questions, comments, concerns. How can i get this ministry afloat?"
My gut thought is - why do they have to come to us? Why can't we go to them? Why do they have to come to our four walls and sit in our pews? Why can't we go play basketball with them? Or knit with them? Or walk with them? I do not believe it is a change in worship style or music that will bring our generation to the table. I believe it will be authentic outreach and genuine conversation where we listen more than we talk and we seriously take into consideration what is being said.
Ministry to your own age group begins where you are. Where you hang out. Where you like to be. (Again, regardless of generation.) Start asking your peers about their faith life. Not about their church life, about their faith life. Listen closely. Ask clarifying questions. (For example, "I hear you say that you miss your having your age group in church and want more participation in those aged 18-35. Is that correct?") Listen more. Perhaps in their words you will find what they are seeking. And it may be that WLLC has exactly what will meet that need and you can invite them joyfully to the established ministries of a wonderful congregation. Or perhaps there will be some wisdom in what you hear and learn that will lead you on a completely different path and a new ministry will bless WLLC in the process.
Good luck, Sean. May the fires of the Spirit continue to burn within you. You will be in my prayers.
Carry on in joy!
Listening to younger adults
Hi Amanda and all, thanks for this reminder to listen in an open way and ask curious questions. We are addressing this through a congregational listening season this fall, and it seems important to have as many young adults as possible on the planning team, and to follow their lead.
I also find your description of young adult life issues to be really helpful. Do these ring true to you, Sean? Wonder how to navigate this concern about judgment and silencing of the opinions and thoughts of younger participants, or anybody new, for that matter....
Your knowledge of this
Your knowledge of this subject comes through clearly in this article. I love to read this kind of articles, I hope you will update it. Thank you for sharing it with me.
Bipolar
Think Out Loud
If you missed it today, I recommend taking a listen to this portion of OPB's Think Out Loud:
http://www.opb.org/thinkoutloud/shows/youth-and-religion/
It talks about the survey being done of Portland young adults on their views of religion/spirituality. Really interesting!
Comparing notes
If Sean or another of the demographic is still around this conversation I'd like to compare notes.
I'm 66. I want purpose and meaning in my life.
For the first time in over 30 years I get to church shop.
If I come to your church I'm looking for three things.
Is this significantly different than the "missing generation" is seeking? If it is, in what way?
Thanks for the questions and the seeking.
Young Adults - Complex - Not One Issue - Not One Block
Thanks for the converstaion here.
There is no one answer - except maybe relationships. People (all ages) come because of relationships (maybe they need more, maybe they are already connected, maybe they are seeking) - including young adults.
We have barriers - that include expectations: too often you aren't seen as a "real" adult until you are married, and I as a recently married person experienced this a bit on a larger church level shortly after arriving in the synod two years ago); the expectation that young adults don't want to be or are not faithful or spiritual; the expectation that young adults have nothign to offer, are not committed or responsible, etc... We also have hurdles that at times we can do something about, but too often we don't notice: activities/programs all indicate or imply that you have children or a spouse to participate, or timing doesn't work for a typical (if there is such a thing) young adult to get involved (ie - our women's Bible studies meet at 9am on Tuesdays). Additionally the language of "young adults" is confusing - are we talking 18-25 (as the ELCA often does); are we talking out of college - marriage (which for some never ends); are we talking about the "youth" of our congregations (a term that some have now started referring to high schoolers by as a sign of "respect"); are we talking 18-30 something (even here in this thread I noticed at least 2 different understandings or brackets of ages); single, married, college, career, kids, no kids - WHO IS A YOUNG ADULT? Finally we ourselves - as a church - feel irrelevant because of the compounding fo the above - and just stop trying.
For me due to my experience in college-early 20's, and even so in my 30's, some research and writing I did in my last two years of seminary, and my work now I try to respond and engage in the following ways (although never perfectly or always):
* Relationship - I just get to know folks. I have been serving in my current call for about 2 years and have probably had more coffee than any person in their lives should ever consume, simply in one-on-one or small group conversations, getting to know our young adults (for my category - anyone 18-30 something, mostly single/married and no kids, but there are some expecptions)...what their passions are, how they came to or bumped into St. Luke, what their gifts are, and how to begin to connect them.
* Fellowship - we have some simply blatant fellowship times - BBQ's, dinners out, etc...for no other reason than for connecting young adults with each other (in a congregation like St. Luke this can be harder than one thinks).
* Connections with ministry areas of interest/skill/passion and service opporutnities.
* Finally, we are not beginning (one going, two more in creation mode) launching small groups that commit to meeting at least monthly and are more than a happy hour or coffee hour (ie - including prayer, devotional/spiritual conversation topics, and checking in with each other when one is absent.)
It is a slow process, but the connections made go a long way. Our fastest growing population at St. Luke is the 18/21-40 (with the 0-18 group not too far behind)...they are not all connected through this pattern, but all are connected and continue to be a part of the life and ministry of St. Luke because of relationship.
My work in small groups is still in its infancy, but for us, right now, this is how we connect. Then I, when we talk about leadership and minsitry positions that we are discerning folks for, often ensure that in the mix is a young adult (again 18-30 something), and any new folks to the community (regardless of age) I encourage to connect through a ministry, team, or group that connects with who they are, where they come from, and what skills/experience they bring.
It is not programmatic. It is not one issue. It is not wholly location (although that can sometime be a challenge that you just can't get beyond). It is about relationships.
IMHO anyway. Look forward to further commentary and ideas bubbling here.